Life through a death experience and after it

Enjoy it while it last.

Death is something beautiful in my experiences, is the only thing that can make us appreciate life and enjoy it more. Is like this famous phrase… You don’t know what you have until you lose it, well death experience is the same thing. Of course death is a difficult issue to talk about it, few people can talk about it, and more difficult is SURVIVE to the deaths appointment.

I’m not used to talk about it, family and some close friends now about this experiences.

I used to be sick with two illnesses one call Histoplasmosis and the second the famous bitch call cancer, both with elegant way to act.

I will not talk about my entire story, just the kind of thoughts and some experiences related with dead.

First when youre sick and you don’t know what is wrong with your body is always the same questions ¿ I will die? This is the part when you star creating more questions ¿When? , ¿How? , ¿Where? , ¿It hurts? Or ¿ it will be quick?

During the long process when they try to figure out what do you have, you star to know a lot of new people, living the same torture story. Different ages, jobs, ways of think, food, believes and economic position. Why I mentioned this thing because all of it gives a fuck when you are going to die.Everything in your life turns easy Yes, No, maybe, sometimes. ¿Did you smoke? no , ¿did you feel pain ? Yes or sometimes, ¿How often you visit the doctor? Maybe 3 times in the year.¿ did you drink? Yes. That’s the way life turns in hospitals.

Days go and go but there is the moment when you don’t know which day of the week is or maybe the time is resume in 3 meals per day and shower in the morning is actually the only way to have some knowledge of time at the end of the day is useful

Remember the thing that give a fuck well, the other people think the same way as you do, so when you talk to them you have one of the most honest conversation in your life, you don’t know if you will be alive the next day so everybody express their feelings, we don’t want to die without say the true and we want that true get into our love ones ears.

So in fact when you spend some time in a hospital you share your story and they share with me, it sound weird but you have many life’s in one day. Many of them end in some kind of tragedy or in the dead, others in joy and happiness, but tragedy and dead could be the same or not, depend in how you see it or live it, if this person is suffering a lot I think for my perspective is the happy end, no more pain, no more question, no more three meals per day, no more life’s to life just the eternal silence…

At the moment we have talk about feelings, thoughts, stories and of course the experiences. There is one more thing… The pain, the physical pain the kind of pain you feel when your skin burn, the pain of the needle, the pain that the analysis and tests create to know what’s wrong with you, healing through pain. This is how it works, there is moment you know your physical limitations ¿how much can I support? So this is the exact moment when the mind and your body know each other, they try to find the balance to support everything, you must learn to control your feelings and control your body. Each of us we have different life experiences, that take us for different paths but we reach to the same point, to the same way of thing ¿what I must do to survive ?¿ how I have to deal with the pain?¿ how to balance the equation between dead and live? That’s the moment when the journey begin, you walk into a deep forest of questions, knowledge, wisdom and maturity.

So you have an idea of how is fight the death of course is hard to explain every feeling and thought and this is just my experience my point of view. All of us we learn in different ways this kind of situations make us change but also change the persons around us that’s the part we don’t know, there is thinly line between been sick and care the sick one, in other situation between the one who fight death and the one who watch. There is no way that each other understand, but there is a not write line that said… I respect you.

After sometime when you realize that you beat death is when everything got clear, you star to understand something about death.

For me the biggest lesson is… ENJOY LIFE AS MUCH YOU ENJOY DEAD why this line, because when you walk to the forest where the journey begin you enjoy every day as the last one , every food, every word, every kiss, every I love, every I miss you , every hug that your love ones give you, you enjoy it as the last one, thanks to the death you learn to valorize everything and after you survive you star do it as normal act , all the new persons, feelings, situation, adventures and decision, you enjoy it as the last one, but now you do it in a natural way. Life now is easier and simple there is no worries. We enjoy everything even the bad days are beautiful and all the persons who stand by your side now you look at them with admiration.

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